The forbidden love

Sometimes we're overwhelmed by feelings we can't quite understand, and sometimes it's really hard to accept them without the burden of hard guilt, our love, for example, for someone we "shouldn't" love, at least not the way I experienced it. I was 17 years old at the time. We lived on a small farm in the interior of Paraná. My mother, a beautiful woman of German descent, was strong and slender at the height of her 35 years. I always had beautiful memories of her. I don't know when the filial love, which we all naturally nourished for the sweet woman who nursed and cared for us, turned into something I didn't know very well. Suddenly to see her blond hair gently falling to her shoulders, or her breasts numbed under her fine dress, took my breath away. I was overcome by an indescribable feeling of trembling, of warmth, I know. Things from early adolescence that I could hardly hide... Until that night. We were alone. My father, who used to travel a lot on business, had just left. We had eaten dinner and there was not much left to do but to sleep, after the usual conversation near the fireplace, which always kept us warm on cold winter nights. My mother had not been cheerful for a long time. The relationship with my father, already worn out by the endless absences, was not good at all. She could not disguise her sadness and, feeling how much she needed a consolation, before I said goodbye, that night I approached her and gently embraced her. "What's the matter, mother? "it's nothing, angel. you wouldn't understand... my life with your father... well, we'd better not even talk about it. we're not going to sit here brooding over my sorrows". "But you don't have anyone to talk to! Aninha only comes back from the city for college holidays and her sisters never show up here. We're always alone. Why don't you open up to me?" She thanked me with a beautiful smile, hugged me tightly and kissed me. A kiss like so many I was already accustomed to, only a little delayed, enough to make me burn inside. As a joke, to stimulate in her a new smile, I held her face with both hands and began to kiss repeatedly each of her faces, her forehead, her eyes. We were always very affectionate with each other and at that moment a larger wave of affection seemed to have taken us. Half that by accident one of the kisses was very close to her mouth. She did not show any discomfort and returned the successive kisses. We seemed, then, more content, our spouses continued to be embraced. We settled better on the sofa and deeply, she sighed, commented on how vulnerable it was to be able to raise my little body with attention and loved to count. She seemed to have been living in the world. She seemed to have been sleeping for a long time. She had left her head paralyzed. She let me sleep for a long time, and I noticed that it was a little easier for me to sleep with my own body. She had been sleeping in my room for a little while, and I felt as if she had been sleeping for a while. She had been sleeping in my bed, she had been sleeping for a little longer, she had been sleeping for a little longer, she had been sleeping for a little longer, and I noticed that she had been sleeping with her coaxing, and I was making a little bit more comfortable, and I was almost ashamed of her coaxing, I was using her coaxing, and a little bit more careful of her coaxing, and a little bit more careful. I was in a whirlwind of ideas. I knew that it must not be true, but I could not really understand why it happened. Every morning I was driven out of bed by the rain. I was driven out of bed by the rain, but I could not really understand why it happened. I went to my bed, and I was wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm. I was still wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm. I thought that I had died. I was still wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm. I thought that I had died. I was still wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in a wonderfully quiet rhythm until I was wrapped up in a wonderfully happy rhythm until I was completely wrapped up in wonderfully wrapped up in wonderfully happy rhythm until I was wrapped up in wonderfully wrapped up in wonderfully wrapped up in wonder rhythm until I was wrapped up in wonderfully wrapped up in wonder. I hurried back to my room and got dressed to take a shower, wondering how everything would turn out from there. I walked into the kitchen and found my mother, beautiful and smiling, helping to arrange breakfast. When she noticed my presence, she wiped her hands on her apron and extended her arms towards me, offering a warm embrace. She looked deeply into my eyes and, without saying a word, told me everything. Her look to me clearly said: "I love you, I am still your mother, we have done nothing wrong. When we can talk about everything, when we are ready, we will do it at the right time. It is all right when you are honest and sincere with yourself and with each other. There should be no room for guilt". Well, at least that's what I understood, that our lives went on as normal, only with the addition of countless other divine moments, which I'll tell you about someday.